Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Terrible Two's...

They have come early to our house. Sigh... My sweet little boy still has plenty of cuddly moments with hugs and kisses for his mama, but he's also having a lot more defiant moments these days. I know, kids get themselves into trouble just out of curiosity when they're little, and I can handle that (on most days). What I really can't tolerate, nor should I, I suppose, is the deliberate disobedience. He is testing his boundaries, normal, but totally testing my patience at the same time.

little architect (with Dad's help!)

I have read so many discipline books that they have all run together, and I fear that I wasted my time because I can only remember bits and pieces of what they said. Ugh. I consider myself to be a pretty stern mother, when necessary, but no matter how serious I am, half the time I only elicit laughter from Avery when he's being scolded. We do spank if he deliberately disobeys and does something right after being told not to, but even that doesn't seem to make much of an impact. I also am not at all comfortable with spanking in public, so other than simply picking him up and leaving, I'm not left with much ammunition. We use distraction and try not to bribe. Is he too young for time outs? I really don't want to read all the books over again...

twins! Wants to eat his cereal just like his Daddy...

So all my mommy friends out there- send me your tricks!! This is one steep learning curve for a first time mama.
:/

5 comments:

  1. Hey Lindsey,

    I have talked to lots of moms about this time period and discipline. Definitely think about time-outs, but that last for a very brief period of time. 3-5 minutes.... I've also heard of this thing called 1, 2, 3, magic. It's essentially disciplinary tactic that avoids parents bargaining with your kids. Maybe google that (it's very simple, short, and easy to implement!!). I think the key is finding a balance between letting them learn explore and learn the world while also providing a safe atmosphere for them. I'm clearly not a mom, so these are tips from other moms I've talked to. Good luck with little man!

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  2. Time-out works well for Ellie. When we're out and about it's hard to do a time out, so I often flip her hands or mouth (depending on what she does). I don't do it hard enough to hurt, and it doesn't get as many looks from strangers because it's not so obvious. Now I can just threaten to flip her mouth and that usually works.

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  3. I also agree that Avery is old enough to start time-outs. I have always but them in time-out for 1 minute per year of age. So Avery would be in T/O for one minute. My kids sit in the same spot for T/O each time (thankfully not to often anymore) and when their time is up and I tell them they can get up they must apologize for thier incorrect actions and then they get a hug. - They did something wrong, served their punishment, but Mama still loves them =) It works very well with my kiddos. I'm also a big believer in logical consequences. Ex: Connor throws the Legos after I reminded him not to....then he has to pick up the Legos and they are taken away for a while. They learn VERY fast! ;)
    It takes a lot of work on the parents part at first but if you're consistent in whatever you choose to do, the kids learn quickly! Good Luck, I'm sure you're doing fine!!!!

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  4. Thank you for the tips, ladies! I know consistency is key, and if I can escape this age with most of my hair and sanity I'll be in good shape! :)

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  5. Just getting a chance to read your post. Avery seems very sweet natured, but I totally understand how you're feeling!! It is a much harder job to be consistent, discipline, and instruct as we are called to do as mothers- instead of giving in some days (Personally I often have to fight my own desire to bribe, or just turn on the TV, or give Jack whatever he needs). I know you'll do a wonderful job and figure it out... God to will give you the wisdom and grace to do what we are not able to do on our own! Thanks for sharing.

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